08 March 2005
Thoughts on EM:HD filmed locally
Regular readers might remember that one of my favorite TV programs, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, filmed an episode last month here in Birmingham. It aired on Sunday and the behind-the-scenes version aired last night. The Harris family of Center Point, parents of the only known surviving set of African-American sextuplets were the recipients.My husband was commenting that on the way home, the local talk radio was abuzz. Locally, it is no secret that parenting seven was proving to be a financial challenge for the Harrises. (Maybe I should introduce her to Dave Ramsey?) Upon their birth, many things were donated, including a van that would seat them all.
A year or so, they had fallen behind on the mortgage and faced losing their home. Appealing to the community, neighbors and strangers alike rallied to support them.
My beloved said that radio pundits were disparaging the family's choice to appeal to the ABC program for home improvements. Callers and hosts expressed sentiments along the lines of, haven't they already received enough from our community? When will Dad provide for his family?
One of hubby's acquaintances echoed the sentiments: "Well, no one gave me MY house." Ironically this acquaintance lives in one of the toniest neighborhoods in the South and has mentioned that his father, a prominent community member, funded his education and a good chunk of his home.
Mr. Harris is a teacher, Mrs. Harris (was) a nurse. Both incomes would be enough to put a family solidly in middle class, but nowhere near rich. Hardly an example of, as Star Parker puts it, a welfare queen who takes advantage of the system. Center Point, AL, has historically been a stalwart of blue-collar, hardworking families. I would be surprised if either Mr. or Mrs. Harris had their college educations paid for by their parents or a trust fund. I suspect they are a lot like my husband, the first in his family to attend college -- never mind grad school -- and was able to do so only with the help of work-study, co-op and a significant amount of debt.
I know several large families, mine included, who manage to make ends meet on modest incomes and do a doggone good job of it. It's difficult, and families buy in bulk, make their own cleaning supplies, sew, barter piano lessons, have two sets of bunks in each bedroom, grow gardens, seldom eat out or go to the movies, and exchange thrifty tips on the Internet. However, I've had the time to cultivate those skills one year at a time, not thrown into parenting so many little ones that my home needs a daycare license ;-)
Which leads me to ponder something else. I am not sure that taking extreme measures, such as invitro fertilization, to conceive is biblical. However, if one's body is broken, I see nothing unbiblical or immoral about fixing it, even with drugs. I am open to discussion on all of this, your thoughts sought.
Unfortunately one side effect of some fertility-enhancing drugs is the propensity of the ovary to release enough eggs for a veritable litter of children, rather than the usual one or two.
I have to hand it to Mr. and Mrs. Harris. It would have been easier for them to pick off two or three, and no one would have been the wiser.
I also suspect that there is some envy going on. I mean, I would love to see EMHD wake up Valerie J and her clan, who are looking, Ruthanne and Jay, who are building, Cheryl, expecting # 10 or any of my other blog-sistahs or brothas (to quote Samantha) who are expecting, parenting, or spend quiet lives nurturing and training children, buying gallon-size mayonnaise and dried beans by the ten-pound bag, balancing the budget down to the last dime, educating on a shoestring.
Do each of us have our own measure of grace allotted? Does my neighbor who got a beautiful home, scholarships for all her kids, and nanny service make me ever the more grateful for the mercies God has given me -- an oven that spontaneously works, Valerie, who graciously gave me an extreme makeover: blog edition, four delightfully healthy children, a sturdy home in a safe neighborhood, a husband who loves us and works diligently to provide? Or am I finding my thoughts veering dangerously toward envy, looking for ways to judge and disparage?
I am happy that my neighbors are cozy as a bug in a rug in their beautiful home and that their little ones have college paid for. Meanwhile, I will still hope and pray that those I know and love who walk a tightrope paying for Saxon math, never mind college, will get a visit from Ty one day.
PS -- Local buzz--One thing we have mentioned on the show is the fact that many local construction crews consist of illegal workers. We got this note and photo from someone who happened to walk by this week. Maybe someone should check some cards!
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This is kind of goofy, but I always liked to look at crayon colors. Here's a more comprehensive list. Nothing offensive, just something to remember next time you're on Jeopardy!
Posted by greasy joan at 3/08/2005
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3 Comments:
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flowerlady said...
I think any family who has the courage and faith to say yes to that many babies at once deserves all the help they get...not just at the beginning but all along the way. We have friends who had 5 at one time as well and they needed every bit of help they got and then some. However, I hope the community remembers that they'll need help farther down the line and not just when the babies are babies...too often we give ourselves a big pat on the back because we've helped during hte initial crisis and then left the person/people/family to fend for themselves for the duration.
1:14 PM
I thought once of applying to that show, even printed out the application, then decided I'm way too opiniated about how I like my surroundings (too artsy fartsy myself!!) I realized that if they messed with some of the stuff we've done to our home I'd get a little upset! (oops, there's my control-freakishness sticking out!)
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Anne, you are so sweet to include us in those you think of when wishing the Home Makeover folks would visit some of your friends. But believe me, the Lord has taken such good care of us. I would never in a million years feel we were deserving of such an endeavor as what the Harrises received.
9:10 AMJay and I have absolutely nothing to complain about and everything to be thankful for. I've read on the Momys Digest so many stories of mothers living in terrible conditions and cramped housing. And here Jay ard I are, blessed with nearly 30 acres of land upon which to build a home. Our children will have room to run, and Lord-willing, we will be able to use our home and land for hospitality and ministry purposes much like Dave Black and Scott Brown do. So many of these mothers I know about have hearts that just *ACHE* to be able to be in our position.
I have a godly Momys friend who lives about ten minutes away. She and her husband and seven/eight (8th due in August) children live in a tiny double wide mobile home. My friend is trying not to fret, but she daily lays their living situation at the Lord's feet, praying for provision of a larger home. I am praying that if it is the Lord's will (and if they so desire), that perhaps they can move into our three-level rental home when we move out on to our land (unless He provides otherwise in the meantime).
Are we "wealthy" by *American* standards? Not particularly. We live modest lives and have to tighten the belt too. But we are just extremely blessed, and God has been SO good. The children and I have been reading through the OT and I sure don't want to chance plagues and mouths full of worms for complaining about ANYTHING! LOL
Now as for Valerie J. -- I do second the motion for Extreme Homemakeover to come and bless them. I would love to see this faithful, godly father and mother and their dear crew be blessed in such a way! Wouldn't that be truly AWESOME?? (I try not to say that overused word very often!)
Either way, we have to use the Apostle Paul as our example and learn to be content in all circumstances. (And yes, I have experienced living with virtually nothing to my name - and I do mean nothing, -- but I won't go into detail now.)
As for envying Chris and Diamond? I really don't. I teared up at the "reveal" and loved seeing them speechless as they went through their new home. (If anything, I had to remind our young boys not to be envious of DeWayne's treehouse! LOL)
A nanny service? Forget the nanny! Diamond is going to need help cleaning that place! I wish she could have a couple of good homekeeping minded young girls come weekly to serve her in the capacity of housecleaning, until she gets her littles trained to do the job.
I have more thoughts on the show (such as why do people feel that the birth of a child is equivalent to needing funds for a college education??) but I need to run. (Don't worry, I know that answer.) I'm sorry for rambling, Anne. I'm glad you wrote about the show. I was wondering what you thought!
Have a great day!
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